sherman's wit
Some gems from flight:
"Back in the seventies, all of the rock stars were ugly. And they were great musicians. Do ugly guys compensate for their ugliness by becoming great guitar players? Or do certain guitars choose their homely players like Excalibur chose Lancelot? I wish I lived back in the seventies. As ugly as I am, I might have been the biggest rock star in the world."
"I know I'm not supposed to remember it. But I do. My memory is strange that way. I often remember people I've never met and events and places I've never seen. I don't think I'm some mystical bastard. I just think I pay attention to the details."
"I never understood the people who think that TV is bad for you. I guess they've never seen the Discovery Channel. You can learn science, history, geography, and politics from TV. If you want to find some faith in human beings, just watch one episode of Storm Stories and you'll see heroic people risk their lives to save strangers.
I don't understand human beings. I don't understand the people who risk their lives to save strangers. I wish I knew people like that."
"Most cops are pretty cool, I guess. ... I think a lot of them had drunk, shitty, or missing fathers, just like I did. I think many of them endured chaotic and brutal childhoods, so they become cops because they want to create order in the world... Good cops are lifeguards on the shores of Lake Fucked."
" 'I believe that what we did the other night was necessary,' he says. 'Horrible and necessary. Do you understand that?' Art and Justice fight on opposite sides of the war but they sound exactly like each other. How can you tell the difference between the good guys and the bad guys when they say the same things?"
"Is revenge a circle inside of a circle inside of a circle?"
"So maybe God had God arthritis. And maybe that's why the world sucks. Maybe God's hands and fingers don't work as well as they used to. Maybe God looks down on earth and sees the bad guys and tries to pick them up. Maybe he wants to squish them like bugs. But God's arthritis is so bad he can't make his fingers work."
" 'What the fuck do you want, chief?' He thinks the curse word will scare me. He thinks the curse word will let me know that he once shot a man just to watch him die.
'I knew Johnny Cash,' I say, 'and you ain't no Johnny Cash.'
The man laughs. He thinks I'm crazy. I laugh. I am crazy."
"And then the guy realizes that he can tell me anything precisely because he doesn't know me. He realizes that any stranger can be your priest."
"I try not to laugh, which makes me laugh. 'I'm sorry. I don't mean to laugh. It's not funny.'
'Oh, no, that's the whole thing. It is funny. It's horrible, too. But it's hilarious at the same time. And when I saw that bird hooked up to those tiny little machines, I laughed.'
'No.'
'Yes, I laughed so hard that I forgot my wife and daughter were standing there. And when I remembered, I turned and looked at them, and tey were staring at me with those eyes. Do you know those eyes?' "
"Back in the seventies, all of the rock stars were ugly. And they were great musicians. Do ugly guys compensate for their ugliness by becoming great guitar players? Or do certain guitars choose their homely players like Excalibur chose Lancelot? I wish I lived back in the seventies. As ugly as I am, I might have been the biggest rock star in the world."
"I know I'm not supposed to remember it. But I do. My memory is strange that way. I often remember people I've never met and events and places I've never seen. I don't think I'm some mystical bastard. I just think I pay attention to the details."
"I never understood the people who think that TV is bad for you. I guess they've never seen the Discovery Channel. You can learn science, history, geography, and politics from TV. If you want to find some faith in human beings, just watch one episode of Storm Stories and you'll see heroic people risk their lives to save strangers.
I don't understand human beings. I don't understand the people who risk their lives to save strangers. I wish I knew people like that."
"Most cops are pretty cool, I guess. ... I think a lot of them had drunk, shitty, or missing fathers, just like I did. I think many of them endured chaotic and brutal childhoods, so they become cops because they want to create order in the world... Good cops are lifeguards on the shores of Lake Fucked."
" 'I believe that what we did the other night was necessary,' he says. 'Horrible and necessary. Do you understand that?' Art and Justice fight on opposite sides of the war but they sound exactly like each other. How can you tell the difference between the good guys and the bad guys when they say the same things?"
"Is revenge a circle inside of a circle inside of a circle?"
"So maybe God had God arthritis. And maybe that's why the world sucks. Maybe God's hands and fingers don't work as well as they used to. Maybe God looks down on earth and sees the bad guys and tries to pick them up. Maybe he wants to squish them like bugs. But God's arthritis is so bad he can't make his fingers work."
" 'What the fuck do you want, chief?' He thinks the curse word will scare me. He thinks the curse word will let me know that he once shot a man just to watch him die.
'I knew Johnny Cash,' I say, 'and you ain't no Johnny Cash.'
The man laughs. He thinks I'm crazy. I laugh. I am crazy."
"And then the guy realizes that he can tell me anything precisely because he doesn't know me. He realizes that any stranger can be your priest."
"I try not to laugh, which makes me laugh. 'I'm sorry. I don't mean to laugh. It's not funny.'
'Oh, no, that's the whole thing. It is funny. It's horrible, too. But it's hilarious at the same time. And when I saw that bird hooked up to those tiny little machines, I laughed.'
'No.'
'Yes, I laughed so hard that I forgot my wife and daughter were standing there. And when I remembered, I turned and looked at them, and tey were staring at me with those eyes. Do you know those eyes?' "
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